Saturday, March 26, 2011

A Little Nervous

Until right before I had surgery, I wasn't aware of the period of time everybody lovingly refers to as "Bandster Hell". I was all psyched up for the pouch and the restriction and then I learned the fill didn't come until weeks later. As I was healing, I followed the diet prescribed by my surgeon and nutritionist. As I started eating soft and solid foods, I realized there was virtually NO restriction to be found. At first, I was used to eating very small portions and would be satisfied pretty quickly. But, over the past few weeks, it's almost like I never had surgery. I know I have already mentioned that, but I feel pretty bad about it right now, and I'm here to vent a little just like everybody else. I'm embarrassed to mention specifically what I've eaten in the past few days, so I will just say that I was eating like somebody that appeared not to care about her weight whatsoever. Now it's only 5 days until my fill and I am not mentally prepared at all! I tossed and turned in bed last night and, at one point, I just laid there thinking about the lap band and my fill and how it's going to be/feel. I just really hope I can start to use this tool to its full potential and get my money's worth! I don't plan on toting this supple silicone pal around in my abdomen for nothing, but I wouldn't blame anybody if they said that hadn't been apparent.

Did anybody else go through this? How did you prepare for your fill in the days leading up to it? Did the fill make things better? Please tell me it will... (if it will).

On a more positive note, I did go shopping today and got myself some summer clothes from Old Navy. I got some T-shirts (XL's that are a little fitted right now but will be last longer through the weight loss) and 2 pairs of capris (one size 18 [I had been in a 20!] that are not a perfect fit right now but will be in a few weeks, and since they were on sale and I really liked them, I also bought them in a size 16). I also went to Sunglass Hut and invested in a pair of girly sunglasses. I have a pair of Ray-Ban aviators that James bought me a few years ago before I started flight school and I love them, but they don't go with the dressy sorts of outfits. I have other sunglasses floating around but they are cheap and I don't "take care of them". The glasses I bought today will join my Ray-Bans as "glasses I actually care about" and I will keep them in their case when they aren't on my face. 

Retail therapy... gotta love it!

Well... one more thing. I wanted to post a picture from the past... the thinner past. I would LOVE to make it back to this weight even though my goal weight is 150. I was about 165/170 here. This is 4th of July weekend 2008:

Wish me luck!


  1. Hey :-) I'm in the same boat as you at the moment. 11 days away from a fill and although I WAS eating ok and god portions etc I have started eating more and more. Partly because I am frustrated and bored with the waiting (I thought the worst part of waiting was meant to be done before sugery!!), partly to see how far I can go (always got to push the boundaries lol) and partly just because my head tells me I want to.

    Good luck with your fill, I am very excited about mine :-)

  2. I understand what you are going through. I was in the same place and the fill did help for a little while. Ive now had two fills and due for the next on Thursday which Im ready for. My nurse is putting it in slowly to get to the right mark. Each fill is better but I know Im still not at the 'sweet spot' Im trying to be patient but as you know its frustrating! Good things take time - I learning this slowly. Good luck with your fill!

  3. My first fill helped a lot. My doctor is really conservative, though, so I knew a lot of the work would be on my end until I got to the green zone/ideal restriction level.

    Just continue to follow your dr's orders: Protein first, use smaller plates/utensils/etc, and eat slow slow slow! :)

  4. Oh that picture is so cutie-patootie! Good luck with your fill!

  5. That is an awesome pic, and you will be there in no time! I really struggled with bandster hell as I was expecting restriction immediately, and very disappointed with myself and the weight loss up till my fill. I expected it to be immediate. I did lose several pounds after the first fill, but within a week and a half to two weeks the restriction was gone. Same with the second fill. It wasn't until the third fill that I found lasting restriction. But it is different with everyone, and I was still losing, especially immediately after a fill, so don't fret.

  6. I was banded just before Christmas and already eating too much of things I shouldn't have been eating by New Years Eve. I totally had all the same fears you are having about being "one of those people" that this just didn't work out for.

    Be prepared that some people don't get restriction after the first or even second fill. I finally felt restricted-ish 5 weeks after my second fill, but going into week 7 I think I'm ready for fill number 3. The band is weird like that...some people feel restriction right away, others it takes time to settle in...

    Check out my blog if you want to read about my'll see that my weight didn't start moving much till just the last few weeks.

  7. My first fill helped a little but my second (an current) fill did the most.

  8. Bandster hell is called hell for a reason!! I assure you that it does get better. :) Super cute picture!